One Thing…Holding Your Company Back
As you probably know, I like to talk. More than that, I like to observe and listen. In the last few weeks my travels for the Wharton Global Consulting Practicum and for my own company, Benari, took me to such far-flung places as board rooms and business schools in Israel and cancer centers in Ghana and Senegal. I had an opportunity to watch all kinds of people in action and listen to their stories about striving to ensure great success for their organizations.
I noticed a common theme I’ve often seen wherever I am, seen in many different forms and heard through many different words. It kept appearing time and again. You’re very familiar with what I’m talking about. It’s something you do. And something I do too.
In one case I watched the boss accuse the people working on a project he was overseeing of being stupid and lazy, and not caring if the work was completed well. In another I witnessed someone continually interrupting whoever was speaking and interjecting his own ideas without letting them finish their thought. In a third, several people implore their indecisive boss to just make a decision so they would know what to do.
The action or lack of action I observed in each case was different but the effect was the same. It was negative. For both people and the organization.
We all do things, either through action or inaction, that impair our ability to help those around us and our organizations be the best they can be.
Mostly we’re oblivious to the impact of our actions. The boss telling his people how stupid they are probably thinks this will somehow motivate them. The co-worker who kept interrupting achieved his goal of getting his point across, but at the expense of keeping someone else’s idea from being heard. And the results of NOT making a decision are just as destructive…wasted time and effort, confused people going in the wrong direction, an inability to move forward.
So in the New Year spirit of self-improvement, and thereby improvement in the lives and work of those around us, let’s each decide to perform this little exercise.
During a team meeting or session with a group you work with often, ask each person individually to share the one thing you do that helps them and the organization function well. Write down their responses. Then steal yourself. Tell them to be open and honest as they share the one thing they’d like you to either stop doing or start doing for their benefit and for the good of the organization. Hold back from commenting on their answers other than to ask a clarifying question to make sure you really understand what they’re saying. Once again, write down what they offer.
Then pick one thing from the second list to either start or stop doing. It may not be difficult to choose. (Sometimes you’ll hear the same or similar things from everyone!) Share your choice with the group in this exact format: “I commit to start or stop _______________ for the good of all of you and the organization. “
Now for the hard part. Ask them to hold you to it by telling you when you stray. Again, no protests when they call you out for transgressions. Take it as helpful advice on your journey of improvement.
Regularly check in with your colleagues to make sure you’re still on course. In a few months, after you’ve fully incorporated this new behavior, begin the cycle again and pick another thing to work on until you’ve mastered it. By the end of the year you’ll be amazed at the impact of your changes on yourself and your organization.
Not only will you be on better footing with the people you work with, you’ll also find that everyone joins in to change an aspect of their own behavior…if everyone works on something, imagine what a positive effect that will have on the success of your organization. And imagine how much better your organization will be.
Thanks for sharing and agree. Being mindful of one’s actions is a learned skill. Looking within is not easy to do, but effective when practiced. Taking responsibility (as you mentioned) for our behavior is important and not just to point out other’s faults. How we behave is often mirrored back by how others ultimately respond to us, hopefully positively and with cooperation.
Lynn, Thanks for the thoughtful comment. When I read the last sentence it reminded me of something John Grinder, co-developer of NLP, said to me years ago. “Communication is the response you get.” Too often we point the finger at others for things that actually came about due to our own failings. Steve